Retail Loves Me

Yesterday something remarkable happened. I was handed a job. Just like that. Easy peasy. This makes two days in a row that I've sought and found employment. Sure, there's nothing particularly amazing about this except for the fact that I've been looking for a job for over a year now. Obviously, with no luck.

I'll elaborate. For the past 10 years, I've been an online marketer. I was happy about this and good at it. I'd created a career for myself that paid a respectable salary after my disastrous decision to major in English in college. I’d thought I’d become a publishing maven. After a short jaunt in those old school halls, I discovered, much to my dismay, that the pay in publishing is near non-existent on the first few rungs of the ladder. At least it was back then. I doubt that's changed very much today.

So when I discovered the Internet, my eyes opened to a whole new world of possibilities. I wrangled a job in the internet department of a large company and began to make my mark. I settled happily on search engine marketing (those fancy little ads on the top and side of Google) and I made my new company a lot of unexpected income. Go me! Or so I thought. Once I'd shown them the way to go, they decided to hire an agency to do the work I'd been doing for them and then proceeded to give me the boot. I suppose that was a lesson for me. There's no loyalty in business.

Well, I went ahead and made an entire pitcher of lemonade from those sour lemons (I added a lot of sugar). I landed a much better job in my newly chosen career path and six years later was promptly laid off when the economy took a nosedive. Heh. Serves me right for forgetting my hard learned lesson about loyalty.

Over a year has gone by since that fateful day in May when I got that phone call from Human Resources. The one that says, "Hey, Diane. Can you stop by my office for a minute?" And off I went again to update my resume and hit the interview beat. Trouble was, this time around, there were dozens of me's out there all seeking the same job because they'd been laid off too. Well, they must all have been hired because the opportunities dried up. I was left holding a worthless piece of paper in one hand (my resume) and a ton of bills in my other hand.

I can't even count how many times I came in second to the person who did get the job. Better luck next time. We'll keep your resume on file. I can't count how many times I got an email saying how impressed they were with my qualifications but they decided to go another way. I started to doubt myself.

I stopped looking altogether, needing a break from all the rejection, and rode the unemployment pony for awhile. I caught up on The View and became addicted to HGTV while silently cursing those people who turned down potential homes because they didn't like the color of the granite counter tops. They were quibbling over an inch or two of workspace in the kitchen while I wondered where the next rent check would come from.

Alright, I'm getting a little maudlin. I haven't been quite that desperate yet. But it is true that my savings is almost sucked dry and I was thrown from the pony when unemployment stopped rolling in each week.

Ok, enough. Back to the good news.

I have not one, but two jobs! One full time and one on call. Again, go me!! True, they're both in a field I've never worked in and the pay is minimum wage, but that's just more lemons for the sweet nectar that is lemonade. Who knew that Retail would love me!? Surely, if I'd known I would have gone a courtin' at the malls much sooner. I wouldn't have gone these long four months without the bolstering arrival of a check in the mail. Now, I have an income! Minuscule, sure, but it's a start. I'm going to ride this sucker to the finish line. I'm going to awaken my dormant ambitions to new goals. There's a huge ladder in Retail and I'm going to climb it.

Tomorrow, I must go pee in a cup to assure my new employer that I am not on drugs.

Stay tuned. This is going to get good.